My spouse doesn't understand me
Dear Uncle Blondin,
It's tough being a risk manager these days. At dinner parties, the other guests always appear to have established and credible jobs that takes them between 15 -20 seconds to explain over cocktails. When it comes to my turn, my spouse cringes as I try to explain that there is no clear or generally accepted definition of a risk manager role. She has even suggested that I simply state that I work in finance and leave it at that. I think that she would prefer me to be an accountant. This is most frustrating. What can I do?
Uncle Blondin: Small talk at dinner parties is a challenge - especially when folk can't find anything better to talk about than work. The first tip is to hijack the conversation by saying that everyone spends too many long hours at work to want to bring up the subject over dinner - and then move on to politics or football. If that doesn't do it, then an out-and-out fib can prove to be very effective. A few minutes spent reading up about taxidermy can provide ammunition for a useful conversation blocker and a rapid change of subject by the other guests.
A third option is a diversionary tactic - advise the gathered company that your job is not nearly as interesting as that of your spouse and that she would be thrilled to provide everyone with an update of her professional activities. Such an excess of gallantry kills two birds with one stone - provided that your spouse has something interesting to say (apparent success with this option has been known to backfire later).
Of course, there is always the option to seize the bull by the horns and proclaim with a happy demeanour that you are fortunate to hold one of the most interesting positions in the company. Along with the CEO and CFO, you are one of the very few managers to have a view and an interest across the entire organisation. You are one of the lucky few whose corporate business support role evolves as the business evolves, who is not condemned to life within a functional silo, and who has considerable freedom to define and design your contribution to the business adventure. Such contribution can take many forms - not least being corporate insurance management, an intellectually challenging area where there are plenty of opportunities to excel.
If insurance management is what you do best, or is your core contribution, then say so clearly. It is a fine role - and a fun role (especially when field trips include the occasional golf course). If you don't want to spoil the dinner, though, don't claim to be a ‘risk manager'!
